I Wish For You

If you’ve been following my blog for some time or read my book, chances are there’s a different life calling you than the one you’re currently living. There’s an inner dream to be awakened and followed that promises to set your heart on fire and make you feel more alive and on purpose than you’ve ever experienced. May be you have not a clue what this dream is precisely, other than a faint but persistent nudge from deep within to change your life. Or, may be you do know what it is, but are simply not ready to embrace it, what with all the responsibilities in your life and the horror of leaving what’s familiar—even if the familiar renders you far less than happy. Wherever you are, I can so relate, as it wasn’t that long ago that I was there myself.

As I write this post, there’s probably a warrant out for my arrest for all the business-building rules I’m breaking by being transparent with you. In the last several blog posts, I’ve been utterly open about some of the most intimate and painful trials of my life—along with the personal growth and transformation resulting from them. This post will be no different, except for one aspect: The big trial I’m about to share with you is still in process; I’m not over the hump, yet. Why am I choosing to share it? Because, first and foremost, it is to honor my vow to be true to the integrity of my Authentic Self. I also hope that, in some small measure, my experience will help you feel that you aren’t alone. I don’t aspire to be another “expert,” poised to teach you anything about success and happiness. Instead, I want to be real with you and offer you a snapshot of how I’m navigating my own uncertain path. Through this post, I want to reach out from my heart and extend a hand for you to hold if you’d like, so that we may walk together through the doubtful and fearful times you may be experiencing—or may be about to experience.

Following my mission

It has been a year since I gave up my livelihood as an independent market research and business consultant, which funded a very comfortable life. Instead of continuing to cruise along in that life, I made my lastest leap of faith in answering “Yes” to the Divine Call to be the messenger of REACH, which is the self-empowerment program detailed in my book. It’s also the framework—in whole and in part—for seminars, workshops and coaching through which I wish to help others awaken and follow their dreams. One of my own long-term dreams is to establish a REACH Your Dreams Foundation. The vision is to bring together coaches and change agents around the U.S.—and eventually around the world—and give them tools and a common framework with which to bring hope back to their local communities, to facilitate more dreams to be REACHed. This vision, this dream, is part of my life’s mission to inspire and help others rediscover who they are and love their lives. My mission is the product of many long years of deep—and often extremely uncomfortable—soul-searching. To fulfill this mission is literally why I’m still alive and breathing today.

Truthfully, other than getting my book published last June, I have yet to succeed in fulfilling much of my mission. Sadly, my efforts to promote REACH were mostly in vain. Meanwhile, I live in a very expensive part of the world, and basic survival needs have constantly challenged my commitment to carrying out my mission, despite the lack of results so far. Among all, I have a house that was purchased at the height of the most recent mortgage industry bubble, so I can’t sell it. This house has sheltered me through so much healing and transformation over the last 5 years that it has become my badge of security and validation that I could see myself through anything. As such, I was quite emotionally attached to this badge. At this point, however, I’m ready to let it go, should that become necessary. That’s how deeply and passionately I believe in my mission.

Walking in faith

Having said the above, I’m not immune to doubts and fears, not by a long shot. In fact, over the last year, I’ve experienced several bouts of paralysis, when my resolve was completely squashed by ego judgments of how I’ve wrecked the very stability and security for which I had labored since I was 16. What’s more, not succeeding was a particularly tough pill to swallow, as success was the facade behind which I hid in my entire adult life. As I wrote in a previous post, Returning to Me, without success, I felt worthless. I’ve wished more times than I care to count that my God would materialize into a pair of loving arms to hold me, if only for a few moments. I so needed to be able to take a break from trying to hold it together, to simply be able to come unglued for a little while within the exquisite safety of being cradled, cared for and protected by Divine Love—like the near-death experience I had in December 2008, but less the severe head trauma.

In truth, I have been cradled, cared for, and protected all along, including this past year that truly tried my humanness. It’s nothing short of a continuous stream of miracles that resources have always shown up just in time to meet my human needs. Last fall, in the midst of great fear and doubt, my God told me in meditation that my success lied not in what I was able to sell, but in the fact that I continued to say “Yes” to my calling every step of the way—even when it was far from easy to do so. In the same meditation, I was told:

You have been laboring for a very long time. Let me take care of you for a while. You don’t have to live the hard way anymore. Let me love you. Let me hold you. Let me be there for you. Just let it be.

I sobbed the entire day of that meditation, and cried during every talk I gave that included the above experience—and even now. On the very next day after that meditation, what should have been a routine ATM transaction brought me in front of a banker. For that day only, I was offered an unsolicited personal line of credit. The baffled banker had no idea from where that offer popped up on his computer screen. That mysterious offering of rainy-day funds even before I needed them—in the midst of a credit crunch—was my God showing me very tangibly that I was taken care of indeed.

In addition to miracles like that, every single time I was plagued by doubt and asked God for a sign that I was still on track, I’d get an email from a reader, a listener to one of my interviews, or a workshop participant thanking me in detail for what REACH has done for them. The scale may not nearly be there yet, but what is mine to do—and to keep doing—has always been unequivocally loud and clear. My job is to continue surrendering to and being ready to act on a greater plan, the specifics and timing of which are beyond my human comprehension; they fall into the domain of God. My job is to continue to walk in faith and to never, ever stop believing in my beautiful mission in this life.

A wish for you

On this past Sunday morning, as an answer to one of my “God emails” seeking guidance from the night before, I woke up with a song in my head: “I Wish For You” by Karen Drucker. You can read the song lyrics below, or you’re welcome to listen to a recording of me singing it a capella. I’d like to close this article with that song as a heartfelt wish for you. You may or may not know it. You may or may not be able to feel it. But, be assured that the Pure Love which sustains me—and all the heart-based dreamers, healers, leaders and change makers amongst and before us—is every bit there to cradle, care for and protect you, too. Please never doubt that.

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I Wish For You
by Karen Drucker

I wish for you love.
I wish you success.
Knowing you are worthy of having it all,
You answered the call to serve your highest good.

You have the power within.
Now you begin to share your heart’s desire.
I wish for you joy.
I wish for you peace.
But, most of all, I wish you love.

You have all that you need, all the support
To reach the highest mountain.
But if you’re afraid of feeling secure,
Your angels are watching over you.

Open you heart.
Trust in your path.
Faith will always guide you.
I wish for you joy.
I wish for you peace.
But, most of all, I wish you love.

You’ve got everything inside of you.
Nothing’s gonna stop you now,
There’s nothing you can’t do.
So just state your intentions with a laser beam of light
Go out and shine, you shine, you shine.

I wish for you love.
I wish you success.
Knowing you are worthy of having it all,
You answered the call to serve your highest good.

Open you heart.
Trust in your path.
Faith will always guide you.
I wish for you joy.
I wish for you peace.
But, most of all, I wish you love.

___________________

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About Alice Chan, Ph.D.

Dr. Alice Chan is passionate about developing conscious leaders and organizations. Her path to serve her life purpose has included being an award-winning Cornell professor and a leader in the corporate world for nearly 15 years. She’s the author of the book, REACH Your Dreams: Five Steps to be a Conscious Creator in Your Life, and creator of the program, 30 Days to Living Your Best Life. All content on this blog and website is her own, not the opinions of her employer.

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6 comments
Scott Mabry
Scott Mabry

Your story is an inspiration and an act of amazing courage. It reads like a letter written to each of us. Thank you for taking the road less traveled so that others may follow.

Jodi Chapman
Jodi Chapman

Thank you for another loving, vulnerable, authentic post, dear Alice. I just love you so much. You are so committed to your mission - and what a beautiful mission it is. Your light shines so bright, and your heart is so pure. And to top it all off, I got to hear you sing! Lovely! You don't ever have to do anything to remind me why I love you dearly - and yet, you continue to remind me every single day. I can't wait to connect tomorrow. Tons of love and hugs for now, my brave friend.

Kathryn
Kathryn

Dearest Alice, I am new to your website, and I believe this is the first post of yours that I have read. I am complelled to share with you how grateful I am for the wonderful woman you are. Your honesty and openness is so refreshing and you really touch my heart in a beautiful and loving way. I am grateful to read your words expressed so freely. I relate on a deep personal level to all that you shared in this post. When I started reading your segment "Walking in Faith", I just wanted to reach out to you and say "Please Alice! Don't you know you are always cradled, cared for and protected by Divine Love. The times that we feel doubts, fears, worthless, and in anyway unsure of the decision we made to follow our heart, our true calling, our mission, our true purpopse for this life....This is this precise moment that we must shift to within, to our heart level our instrinsic innate intuition of what we really are....LOVE! Then we will always remember that this is the ego side of ourselves that would love to suck us down very low. It is always the power of our truth and awareness that we are "Love"; and to feel vulnerable and accept that all of our feelengs are part of our true and pure expression of Love. This is when it is time to take a few deep breaths, close our eye's and allow the beautiful child within to be free to express herself. At this moment is when we can just lay our head on God's shoulder and weep if so inclined. This is the moment that you can really feel God's loving arms around you, holding you, cradling you in the most glorious love you have ever experienced. This is the moment to share and to give all your concerns to your Loving Divinity. This is the moment to savor the greatest love of all. This is the moment to know you are safe, secure, and with your faith, hope, trust and love you are very keenly aware, that you are exactly where you need to be.Your leap of "Faith" to follow your mission is Divinely guided. Miracles abound every day that we are alive. The key is to always know in your heart that your ability to see the many, many every day miracles is simply contigent on our own ability and desire to allow our heart to see through our eye's. It is our own diligence and discipline to remain "aware" from within that we are gifted with continuing awakening. Our mind, our intellect, our ego self is what clouds the beautiful vision that only our heart (which I equate to as Love) can see. From the awareness within, coming only from love we can see with complete clarity with all of our senses, to hear, feel, smell, and taste the miracles of each precious moment that we consciously choose to live in....like this moment right now, right here Alice...thank you for sharing this special moment now with me. I will come back to spend more time on your site. Please know that from what I have briefly seen and read...you are on a glorious mission! You shine so brightly and your energy is wonderful, I can feel it in your written words. Thank you for sharing the gift of you with me. Gratefully, Kathryn

Alice Chan, Ph.D.
Alice Chan, Ph.D.

Thank you so very much for your encouragement, Scott! It may be the road less traveled, but the people I've met since taking it have been absolutely amazing, like yourself. It frightens me to think of whom I might have missed had I not taken it or decided to turn back around.

Alice Chan, Ph.D.
Alice Chan, Ph.D.

My dear Jodi, you've succeeded to make me cry every Thursday! This journey simply wouldn't be the same if you weren't walking hand-in-hand with me, and you show up as such an inspiring and beautiful expression of Divine Love each and every day. I'm so blessed to have your friendship! Tons of love and hugs in return!

Alice Chan, Ph.D.
Alice Chan, Ph.D.

Dear Kathryn, I'm so grateful that you visited my website today of all days. Just to show yet again the beauty of synchronicity and Divine Arrangement! I also want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to share your loving wisdom here. As a spiritual mentor of mine once said, we experience darkness and challenges in our lives so that we may feel God. It's entirely true, just like you shared here. Would love to have your presence here again at any time, Kathryn. The door is always, always open for Love to be shared. Thank you for sharing the Love that you are. Many Blessings, Alice

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